that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
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