Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
Randomize
