Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
Is it penis luge time yet?
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
Randomize