I swear she didn't look like that last week.
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
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