haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
Randomize
