You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
Randomize
