I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize