I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
