the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
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