some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
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