She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
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