ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
we can add 'stealing hydrangeas from the sign in front of the credit union because we're too poor to have all of the flower arrangements professionally done' to my list of maybe-felonies
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
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