If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
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