I had a fork in my beer hand and just stabbed my tongue.
Pretty sure my dad just walked in on me jerking off watching guys on webcam. Remember how I used to say "most awkward day of my life?" I'm retiring that phrase.
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
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