Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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