I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
Randomize
