u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!