whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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