I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
Have you finally orgasmed yet?
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
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I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
Be still, my beating vagina.
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I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
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