worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
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