just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
Randomize
