they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
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