i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
he shaved USA in his pubs
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
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