i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Randomize
