Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
Randomize
