i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize
