happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
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