I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
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