Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Randomize