I just walked into the kitchen and my dad was having this uber serious convo
With himself
i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
i think i have two assholes
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
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