I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
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