Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
Randomize
