Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize
