Who wears a wallet chain?!
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
