You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
Randomize
