im so drunk with asians
where?
always
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
Randomize
