singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
Since she's grinding up on your thigh right now, I'm sending you this text hoping it makes your phone vibrate in her vagina
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
