it hurts more in the daytime
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
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