I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
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