Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
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