I fear hooking up with people who have white pillowcases because my guyliner always smears on it and i either have to A. sneak out in the night or B. wash it and see them again
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
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