Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
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