Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
Randomize