you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love how my cats smell like pot.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
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