I puked a lego.
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
Randomize
