dude, mark had the least successful cab ride in history last night. took a cab to the bars, stopped at every atm in the city, none worked, then had to come back to the party to beg for 20 to pay the taxi that officially took him nowhere.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
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