Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
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