Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
After tacos, we're chasing women.
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Randomize
