Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
