I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize
